If you've never had depression, it's hard to understand. At this very moment, I look absolutely normal on the outside. On the inside is a different story. My mind feels completely out of control and I literally feel like I want out of my own skin.
Now I hear you asking yourself, "If you know you have it, why don't you get help?" Well, that's the problem. I did get help. I was on a certain antidepressant that was working wonders for me and then my insurance stopped covering it. FUCK!!! Now I'm on a different one and although I didn't have a lapse between medications, I am having a manic episode including extreme anxiety and agitation. I've been on the new medicine for almost 2 weeks and it is NOT working.
Add to all of that, the fact that I could get the generic of the first medicine for only $15.43. Why don't I you ask? Well, we are already struggling to pay our bills and juggling them around the best we can. That money would take away from our electric or water or even gas for my husband to get to work.
No wonder more people don't get help for their issues. In this economy it's just so hard to provide for your family and take care of yourself. I just want to cry, but what would that help?
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